Artist Name: Joshie LFD
Tumblr: http://tumblr.j0sh1e.co/
"Untitled 6" by Joshie LFD.



When you hear your parents talking about you with other people in a different room…




(via mac-attackz)


personal blog

I’ve been feeling tired lately. Tired enough to look at alternatives to living. I weigh the options in my head while out with friends. Work or a bottle of pain relievers? Leaving my bed or jumping off a bridge? The thing of rope in the garage or what, an education? A landlord to pay rent to? Another day to fill?

What’s the point?

I say the words aloud, hoping they’ll make more sense.
Three syllables. Three clicks of the tongue.
What’s. The. Point?

I sigh.
Pull my clothes on.
Twist my fingers tightly into a ball.
I don’t know.

Maybe there isn’t one. Maybe this question will continue to circle
over and over and over and over again in my head, acting as the only marker that I am the same person in the same body, housing the same thoughts.

Six years old, I stared tearfully,
with head pressed to window,
at the blur of dead hills.
What’s the point? I asked.
Eight, I ran with face down,
sweating through warm streams
in the California heat,
catching frogs in-between my fingers.
What’s the point? my feet splashed.
Thirteen, wiping away tears in a public bathroom stall,
trying to press myself deep into the bus seat
to keep from being seen.
What’s the point? I cursed.
Fifteen, thinking I understood love songs
as my lips learned about kissing
behind the community center.
Sixteen, scratching his name out of my desk
the rest of the semester.
What’s the point? I spat.
Eighteen, all moved in,
listening to my friends sloppily
clink their glasses together downstairs
as I lay in the dark,
feeling lonelier than ever before.
What’s the point? I shook.
Twenty-one, no longer amused,
feeling too old to not
have these things figured out
and too young to be gentle on myself.

What’s the point?
I don’t know.

But a part of me
(that has perhaps existed longer than my questioning)

No one knows.
We are all here to find out.

Making My Own Point | Lora Mathis (via lora-mathis)

Bash Bish Falls